paro

2016. The year of realising things - Kylie Jenner. Everyone thought that that was such a bimbo statement but man, it couldn't have been more accurate. I learnt so much this year. Over the span of 12 months, I've managed to get my heart broken 2 weeks before my birthday. And then, I fell in love again, only to have it end with another hole in my heart. I started off the year, in a relationship, thinking that I was going to stay with that boy forever. I was so sure I was going to end up marrying him. Six months later, after weeks of feeling so unhappy with myself and just everything in general, I ended things with him. I could feel myself dragging him down with me, down a path I would never wish unto anyone, so I let him go because I knew that, God, that lovely boy deserved so much better than someone so broken, so selfish. The few weeks that followed were no doubt, terrible. I was lonely, and the worst part was that I was left alone with myself. I was forced to handle my own

Hey you. How have you been? Its only been a few weeks but it feels like a lifetime has passed since you and me came to an end. Since then, its been a rollercoaster of emotions. At first, i hated you. I hated you with all my guts. I despised you for not fighting for me. I abhorred the fact that i didnt understand how you suddenly stopped loving me. You never said it out loud, but it was on the table. I couldn't comprehend why else you wouldnt stay. People only leave when they don't love you anymore. So i guess that might have been the reason you left without too much of a struggle. And then after the anger came the inexplicable sadness. Although i was the one who asked for the break up, it felt like i was the one being dumped. It seemed like it too. I was the only one who seemed to feel sad. I was the one consumed by it. All I could think about was just "where did i go wrong?" "Why doesnt he want me anymore?" "How do i fix this?" I couldnt stop thin