Maybe you're right.
Maybe, i never really loved you.
How could i have? I never really knew you. the real you.
I spent nine months in a relationship with you, knew you for a year, and yet to this day, i still can't say that i knew you. Not really. Not to your core. So how could i have loved someone i barely knew despite the amount of time we spent together?
Maybe, i loved the mystery that you were. I fell in love with the thought that you were this endless maze of complexity. I fell in love with the thought that by loving you, i would know you. I've always loved mysteries and the thought of falling in love with one got me excited.
Or maybe, I loved how good we looked together. How, on paper, in pictures, and the thought of us together just looked so right. An aspiring engineer and an aspiring architect. Two people seemingly hopelessly in love despite being in a long distance relationship. The way we met. Our first kiss. "Us" was something that would've came straight out of a Nicholas Sparks novel. Maybe i was in love with that, instead of you.
But if i hadn't loved you, i wouldnt have stayed. I wouldn't have taken the time trying to figure you out. I wouldn't have fought for us to the end. And if i really didn't love you, it wouldn't have hurt as much as it did when you left.
Did you love me? Did you really love me, for me, or did you fall for the thought of me too? Did you fall for the me that was always happy, always cheerful, something more than what i really was. Is that why you left? Did you leave because you saw that i wasn't as simple as you thought i'd be? Or did you really even love me, at all? Perhaps i was just something for you to bide your time with while you decided what you really loved. and what you really wanted.
I don't know. I don't really know if any part of us was real anymore. Maybe i'll never know. You're just another unsolved mystery. I guess i'll just have to live with that.
Maybe, i never really loved you.
How could i have? I never really knew you. the real you.
I spent nine months in a relationship with you, knew you for a year, and yet to this day, i still can't say that i knew you. Not really. Not to your core. So how could i have loved someone i barely knew despite the amount of time we spent together?
Maybe, i loved the mystery that you were. I fell in love with the thought that you were this endless maze of complexity. I fell in love with the thought that by loving you, i would know you. I've always loved mysteries and the thought of falling in love with one got me excited.
Or maybe, I loved how good we looked together. How, on paper, in pictures, and the thought of us together just looked so right. An aspiring engineer and an aspiring architect. Two people seemingly hopelessly in love despite being in a long distance relationship. The way we met. Our first kiss. "Us" was something that would've came straight out of a Nicholas Sparks novel. Maybe i was in love with that, instead of you.
But if i hadn't loved you, i wouldnt have stayed. I wouldn't have taken the time trying to figure you out. I wouldn't have fought for us to the end. And if i really didn't love you, it wouldn't have hurt as much as it did when you left.
Did you love me? Did you really love me, for me, or did you fall for the thought of me too? Did you fall for the me that was always happy, always cheerful, something more than what i really was. Is that why you left? Did you leave because you saw that i wasn't as simple as you thought i'd be? Or did you really even love me, at all? Perhaps i was just something for you to bide your time with while you decided what you really loved. and what you really wanted.
I don't know. I don't really know if any part of us was real anymore. Maybe i'll never know. You're just another unsolved mystery. I guess i'll just have to live with that.
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